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Did you hear about the Aggie who won't use toothpaste because he doesn't have
any loose teeth.
Did you hear about the Aggie who moved his house closer to the street to take
up the slack in his clothesline?
Did you hear about the Aggie who designed the coolest door on a submarine?
It was a screen door. It worked in keeping the fish out.
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought the center of gravity was the
letter V?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought ball-joint suspension was the
closing of the local whorehouse?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought pantyhose was what you watered
underwear with?
Did you hear about the Aggie who sat up all night on his wedding night
waiting for the swelling to go down
A slash mark (/) is an Aggie ROTC at attention.
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought "Don't Walk" was an advertisement
for the bus company?
Did you hear about the constipated Aggie who worked it out with a
slide-rule?
Then there was the Aggie who used some nasal spray and got diarrhea
An Aggie came home and found his wife in bed with another man. The Aggie
stormed across the bedroom, took a gun from a dresser drawer and pointed it at
his own head. His wife started laughing. "Don't laugh at me!" he said angrily,
"You're next!!"
Did you hear about the Aggie who saw "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?" and
guessed wrong twice?
Did you hear about the Aggie who went to his wealthy girlfriend's house?
The butler announced, "Cocktails being served in the library!" So, the Aggie
ran all the way downtown.
Did you hear about the Aggie who learned to count to twenty one? He was
arrested for indecent exposure
Did you hear about the new parachute developed at A&M? It opens on impact.
Did you hear about the Aggie whose father told him about the birds and
bees? Two days later he was stung by a bee and he thought he was pregnant.
Do you know why Aggies save the rings off of beer cans? To use as combination
class rings and nose pickers.
Aggie mothers are strong and square shouldered from raising dumb-bells.
Aggie birth certificate: A letter of apology from the Trojan Rubber
Company.
Did you hear about the Aggie football player who demanded a 50% discount
from the chiropractor because he was a half-back?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought an innuendo was an Italian
suppository?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought a pole vault was a jock strap with
a lock on it?
Did you hear about the Aggie who wanted to be a pharmacist, but couldn't
figure out a way to get the medicine bottles in the typewriter
Asked what he thought about the Civil Rights bill, an Aggie replied, "Well,
if we owe it, we ought to pay it".
Did you hear about the Aggie who stayed up all night studying for his urine
test?
Prof: You missed class yesterday, didn't you?
Aggie: No, not a bit.
Did you hear about the Aggie scientist who developed an artificial appendix?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought Oral Sex was a class in marriage
counseling in Oklahoma?
Do you know how an Aggie spells farm? EIEIO
Did you hear about the rich Aggie whose girlfriend told him she liked hard
rock--so, he bought her a petrified forest.
Did you hear about the Aggie who threw himself on the floor and missed?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought "vice versa" was a dirty poem?
The toughest thing in College Station is riding shot gun on a garbage
truck.
Definition of a galloping gourmet: an Aggie running after a garbage truck.
Did you hear about the Aggie who was such a poor reader that he belonged to
the Page of the Month club?
Did you hear about the Aggie who went to the jewelry store to buy a tornado
watch?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought High Cholesterol was a religious
holiday?
The Aggie was asked if he preferred red or white wine with dinner, "It
doesn't make any difference," he said, "I'm color blind."
Did you hear about the Aggie who won a gold medal in the Olympics?
He was so proud of it he had it bronzed. He won the medal in the javelin
catching event.
Did you hear about the Aggie who phoned a camera store and asked if he could
rent some flashbulbs?
Did you hear about the Aggie who bought $100,000 worth of tires because he
wanted his house to have white walls?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought an exorcist was a guy who came to
your house to help you get in shape?
Did you hear about the Aggie who bought a ladder, and carefully put a sign
on the top rung: "STOP HERE."
Did you hear about the Aggie who tried to stand on his hands? He broke both
of them when he stepped on them
Did you hear about the Aggie who was so obnoxious that when he talks to his
plants... they turn away?
Did you know that seven port-o-potties stacked on top of one another is
called an Aggie condominium?
Did you hear about the Aggie daredevil who jumped 21 motorcycles with a
Mack truck?
Did you hear about the Aggie who thought Emory Bellard was something you did
your fingernails with?
"Why did they put this depot so far from town?" the traveling salesman
asked an Aggie at a rural railroad station. "Well, stranger," said the Aggie,
"I'm not sure, but I guess they wanted it as close to the tracks as possible."
Do you know what the city does when an Aggie fails to pay his garbage
assessment? They stop delivery.
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